Friday, October 29, 2004

have been wandering about the net, in lieu of making the final 'sprint' through four large essays... and came across this, through this site here. i found it so haunting, i felt that i needed to propagate it (which is what blogs are for, so it's possibly a little out of place to be justifying it like this... ho hum, self-blogconsciousness. tho it does feel as though i'm riding on someone else's coat tails by lifting this...)

also, as a result of k-punk and georges bataille reading, i've been looking up things about gnosticism. if i were to pick a religion, that would be the one for me. not that i mean to sound so flippant - that is, in-a-supermarket sounding (i'm not shopping for 'spirituality'). i just feel that i need to start mapping out my philosophical allegiances. sure i like nietzsche, but now what do i do with him? what do i make of bataille's grasping at filth? and what about this whole spinozist-machine thing over at k-punk? or walter benjamin's project of history-as-revelation, kabbalah-marxist style?

oh, and i'm finding this whole "hobbits in indonesia" thing rather exciting. it makes the news slightly less repetitious - rewriting history, rather than exploding the present with "news!" tho this might be another bataille thing - since reading his Lascaux, or the Birth of Painting, i'm intrigued by prehistorical stuff.

i honestly think that i must be the most easily influenced person in the world. almost every theorist i read, i think about emulating - nietzsche, deleuze and guattari, bataille... it goes back a long way, too. i remember during 'quiet reading time' in year 3, reading the children's bible, and interpreting the calmness i felt afterwards as "god wanting me to be a saint". flash-forward 12 years to the bataille presentation i gave at the beginning of the semester - after getting no sleep the night before giving the talk, i messaged my girlfriend before leaving for uni in order to tell her, quite seriously, that "i am a prophet, and am walking to uni where i will teach my class the ubermensch". eek. i wore my 'jesus is my homeboy' t-shirt (bought in new york, and therefore not tragic like the ones bought in dangerfield here in melbourne) too, so that people might better recognise my resemblance to john the baptist. alarming but true.

(jung would call me an 'extrovert', overly concerned with the world of objects - but then again, jung talks new-age horseshit, so i won't pay too much mind to that.)

cd of the moment - dizzee rascal's showtime. it's just so nice to have a new cd that isn't a "greatest hits" type one, bought at the behest of the fam. tho i can't play it with ma around the house... sigh, the generation gap...


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